QuoraAnswers: Is It Possible For A VerySexually Active Narcissist To Go Into A MonogamousRelationship If He Has E.D.?
As crazy as it sounds, probably not. My former business partner was a covert narcissist, and at 80 years old, complained regularly about having E.D.
He still chased women shamelessly, even though his long-suffering wife was an amazing woman.
Shortly before he died, he made me his power of attorney, and I handled all of his business and personal finances.
No less than five young women contacted me to ask for money. He had been taking care of all their bills, and they weren’t ready for the gravy train to end.
I don’t know how much sex was involved, considering his claims of impotence. But I do know he was still hopelessly addicted to narcissistic supply.
As a matter of fact, he was calling his sources right up until the day he died.
I guess anything is possible, but I certainly wouldn’t bet on a narcissist ever being completely monogamous.
Is The Fuel Derived From Married Or Committed Targets More Satisfying To A Narcissist?
Sometimes it is, depending on the situation.
For the most part, a narcissist doesn’t care one way or another about a target’s relationship status. A target is a target, married or not.
However, narcissists love a challenge and love to cause misery for other people.
If a target is in a relationship with a person the narcissist perceives as having wronged them, their satisfaction will be increased considerably.
The thrill of revenge, along with the excitement of the chase, will make the fuel especially rewarding to the narcissist.
With that said, there are single, unattached targets whose fuel is equally satisfying.
For example, a narcissist finally succeeds in conquering a woman who didn’t succumb easily to his charms.
He had to put forth more effort, and for a longer time, than he normally does. Once the target becomes the victim, and at long last, the narcissist gets the much sought-after fuel, it’ll be especially rewarding, as well.
But no matter how satisfying each target’s fuel happens to be, narcissists still quickly become bored.
They will always seek even more narcissistic supply from other sources. Always.
In actuality, a narcissist is cold before, during, and after sleeping with a woman. They just act like they’re not while they’re trying to reel you in.
Once they achieve that goal, they fluctuate between hot and cold to confuse you and keep you guessing.
Narcissists are very skilled actors who can convince you that they’re sincere, loving, and that they feel a strong connection to you.
During sex, they’ll look deeply into your eyes and whisper all the words you want to hear. You’ll believe those words and think the incredible sex is strengthening an amazing bond.
Afterwards, you’re left wondering how someone who showed so much intensity can suddenly become cold and unfeeling. The truth is that they may have showed intensity, but they didn’t feel it.
They were only pretending to be warm and loving. The coldness you witnessed is a more realistic view of his true nature, although even that is just a glimpse.
Until you’ve completely lost your usefulness to him, you won’t see the full picture of what lies beneath the mask. Once that happens, cold will be an understatement.
QuoraAnswers: May I Ask Your Advice? I’m Having A Really Bad Time After Being Discarded By My Narcissist Ex, And I Just Now Realized He’s A Narcissist.
First and foremost, have mercy on yourself.
Understand that you are not to blame for being conned by a narcissist.
So many people who have never been entwined in a narcissist’s web of lies falsely believe that it wouldn’t happen to them.
They are dead wrong. It can happen to anybody.
Prepare yourself mentally for pain.
Think about what you’re going to go through on your path to recovery in the same way you would if you just broke a bone.
You know you are going to face a certain amount of pain.
There’s no way to get around it.
So accept it.
Embrace it, even, as a valuable life lesson. And learn everything you can from it.
Educate yourself on Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome.
Knowledge is power, though it’s not a pain reliever.
In fact, there will be times when the knowledge you’re gaining exacerbates your pain.
Accept the emotional agony so you can process it.
Allow yourself to cry, scream, and rage when you get the urge.
Find a safe place so you can get it all out.
Purging the negativity is essential and you can’t do it if you restrain yourself.
Be open to new coping strategies.
I took up kickboxing and found it to be very helpful in releasing pent-up anger and rage.
I also find music to be therapeutic.
Everyone deals with things differently, so what works for some people won’t necessarily work for others.
But there’s one thing that is true for everyone.
If you don’t allow yourself to feel the pain, the humiliation, the loss, and the grief, you will not be able to heal.
Your spirit and soul are wounded.
Just like with a broken bone, you won’t recover without facing some necessary pain.
Accept that knowledge and give yourself the time and self-care that are necessary for a full recovery.
