Quora Answers: Narcissists And Second Chances
What Can The Wife Of A Narcissist Expect After She Agrees To Try Again And Not Get Divorced? What Are The Signs She Is Getting Devalued Again?
Expect a renewed, albeit short, version of the lovebombing stage.
Followed by new and more sinister devaluation methods.
Far worse than anything you experienced before.
Your narcissist husband will seem sincere at first.
And you’ll think you made the right choice by not divorcing him.
He’ll tell you how much the marriage means to him.
He’ll thank you for giving him another chance.
And promise you that he’s learned his lesson.
He’ll probably even help with the household chores for a little while.
He’ll text you with sweet messages and call just to say he loves you.
He’ll suck you right back in.
Just like he did during the initial lovebombing stage.
And just like before, the devaluation phase will follow.
You’ll begin to wonder why the hell you ever thought the marriage could be saved.
He will suddenly stop calling and sending sweet messages.
And he’ll ignore your calls and texts.
When he does respond, it’ll be to condemn you for being jealous and insecure.
He’ll point out all the reasons that you’re the cause of the problems in the marriage.
He’ll tell you how much he’s been trying and you’ve been failing.
If he was physically abusive before, he will be again.
This time, however, the assaults will be more frequent and much more violent.
Things will steadily get worse, and you’ll begin to realize you were duped once again.
Then you’ll start to look for ways to escape the nightmare.
But this time, it’ll be even harder to get away.
He may tamper with your car to prevent you from leaving.
He’ll make sure you don’t have access to your own money.
And he’ll make you a prisoner in your own home.
These are just a few examples of what a wife can expect when she gives her narcissist husband another chance.
The one thing she can never expect is true remorse and a sincere desire to change his evil ways.
Not from a narcissist.
Originally Answered On Quora.
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